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Saturday, August 14, 2010

INDEPENDENCE DAY- A formality or Real PATRIOTISM

Happy INDEPENDENCE DAY!!

       So tomorrow Whole country will be celebrating 63rd independence Day with great enthusiasm and joy. people will lounge over their roofs flying colourful kites and enjoying this day but  this leave me with a intriguing question  that no 1 is willing to answer -  What does independence mean to you? And when I say intriguing, I mean the same Damn question every news and entertainment channel asks its viewers in a poll on 15th August,   I decided to give the question some thought. What WOULD independence be for me? Would it be being able to spend a day without taking a dig at Rakhi Sawant or Suresh Calamity?   A day without being told to buy the Slim Sauna belt, Get admission in various downgrade engginering college and make friendship with Shilpa, Pooja or Dimpy?  Be on Twitter without having to figure out my ever increasing no of tweets and taunting my friends about it?
So what I have for you instead, is not my list – but stuff India needs independence from every year on 15thAugust. 


 MEDIA FRENZY :
“Global dominance in software exports”,  “Wax statues of SRK at Madame Tussauds” , “Bollywood” , “Brain drain/gain” , “21st century superpower” , “World’s largest democracy” , “Billionaire’s in Forbes List” , “Seat at UN Security Council”…  that’s ALL I’ve been hearing about. It’s like every bloody newspaper and TV channel has an intern pouring over  with the latest CII statistics to display how India is “poised” to take over this MAD world by 2020, become the world’s second largest economy.






At the other end of this annual report of a news story lies the shock and awe. This is also a country where  we kill our girls before they’ve a chance to be born, Where 60% people Struggle for two time meal and their Grains rott! where  land reform sucks,  Where women have no rights, Where  our people face worse poverty than Congo, how access to Basic needs is a distant dream for half of our population..List is loong!  After watching Peepli [LIVE] yesterday got a rude jolt about the pathetic condition of our farmers which are our feeders and every hour 8 feeders commit Suicide and millions have left farming since 2001. In this way India is Shining ?. But like the great Indian philosophy – it’s just more of the same. 

I don’t see how any of these media organizations are different from Bollywood flicks. Same old story, buzzwords and  self-referencing stories tinged with a “fresh new look” which in this case would be a photo-layout . In short, I appreciate the sentimentality you’re trying to add new things in the same crappy annual report of a story, but it’s as effective trying to Clean down a blocked toilet with a toothbrush!!..

Disgusting measures to make us "kewl":
Our young People are massively  energetic and entilted .








Thus, I find it ridiculous that we have to turn to Gimmicks for awakening of our patriotism. MTV India is one such channel – and this year they launched the “Asli Indian” campaign which includes, amongst other things, the national anthem being remixed. Really? This is what shit has come to that you’re giving the national bloody anthem a “new sense”?  That is what I think of your new god damn sense – where I click on a Like button on Facebook to express my outrage over a particular social issue or i have to tweet about it and then expect my friends saying me a bore! I know MTV and every other channel has already thought up an excellent tri-coloured logo and sent people out to interview youngsters on what “independence” means to them. I’m expecting answers such as “being rich”, “driving a fast car”, “not having to answer to your parents” among some of the answers. And yes, I’m 18. But I’m not stupid. Not stupid enough to know what independence means 2 this Country! So please – atleast this Independence Day, Be real independent..





Changing of DPs and show off










I’m sorry – but I don’t give a Calamity about putting a stupid flag on my Twitter DP,  Getting tagged by Friends and then getting a notification overload about people expressing their Love for India Like they give a damn to it in rest of year, whether 1 million Indians get on a Facebook page before 15thAugust or create a hashtag where I express my love for my country to get brownie points in front of everyone who is watching. For me it is utter Show off. The thing is, me and my generation haven’t had to make ANY sacrifices to get the kind of freedom we have. We can’t claim to understand the depths of what it means at all. . Most of it, like this piece, is pure opinion – and though I’m all for emotion, I think we almost cheapen the day with some of our  social media displays of Independence celebration and completing our formality. Some fucks still have flags of European teams from the football World Cup. So seriously – don’t get excited about your pages and DP s  because that shit is stupid. .
INDEPENDENCE DAY FLICKS
 The 15th August movie list will also remain the same as it does every year and include Gadar, Border, Bhagat Singh, Rang De Basanti, Lakshya, Mother India, some more shit by Sunny Deol, Indian, I – Proud to be Indian and the dubbed version of Will Smith’s Independence Day. News Channels will be showing A.R. Rahman’s soulful rendition of Vande Mataram and some Incredible India commercials whole day. Needless to say I will not be watching any TV. Instead, I will spend the day venting my ire on Twitter and Facebook about CWG, kalamdi etc.. Enjoying Delicacies and Silently remembering the heroes of Independence and  finally dig up a hand pump while shouting “Suresh Kalmadi Zindabad Tha, Zindabad Hai aur Zindabad rahega!”






I can go on and on  but then this will never end. So to conclude, I also think 15th August is one of the few days politicians might feel guilty about slacking off in Parliament.  So maybe let’s just all enjoy Holiday and get independent of things mentioned above! Everyone  knows we have way too many holidays because of random gods who no one gives a damn about anyway. So in shame enjoy another holiday  and in a country where the sky is a fan and we the shit, it really shouldn’t be a dry day. People should be allowed to do some spontaneous drinking and drown in their Own World,






Till then





Cheers :)





JATIN PANCHHI aka JATIN JP





Sunday, August 8, 2010

D Grt CWG Mess!

Well Finally I m Writing  my 1st official post n feeling glad dat i have Chosen the great commonWEALTH mess which is the talking point of every Nukkad in India right now! Every where pick any news paper or flip any channel one and only talking point is CWG!. So here are my views:
    7 years back when New Delhi was chosen to host Commonwealth games the whole country went in celebration as if we have won a Bid for olympics! but still in our cricket crazy and Dont give a damn 2 other sports nation it was a mean achievment!  and as child(I was 11 at that time!) felt Kicked Visualising a dream was coming true n the way Our Honorble CM was Screaming that  Delhi will be World Class, Everything will be changed..blah..blah and i m sorry 2 say except some Develpment! its has reamined blah..blah!
 Then after 2 Years the Organisnig Comittee(OC) was formed and as you say due to  our demons from our past life a moron named Suresh CALAMITY was chosen as its chairman..and as you see in  Left he took dis oppoinity with his Both HANDS! and after galloping thousands of CRORES still his hands are like this and saying
                      
                         YE HATH MANGE MORE



    The CommonWEALTH
What started as thing of excitement and ecstasy it has now become a feared Soon to be Disaster . i dont need to tell you how much time has left and whats the Progress coz our awesome and never TRP ridden News Channels have already made it a daily dose of their Programming! Even the great Acharya Indu  Prakash,on INDIA  TV is saying there is a Kaala Jaadu on CWG! Phew! i m proud of India TV.


  But the main Point is that the hard Earned money of Taxpayers is going in Gutter and in pockets of Morons of IOA.. Thank god i dont pay taxes yet! Well i dont want to tell facts and Figures of the great expenditure but if some 1 interstd can read below-
  India's bid document for the Commonwealth Games in 2003 estimated the cost of hosting the event at Rs 1,899 crore.  Nw sample This the estimates now range from an official figure of Rs 10,000 crore to independent experts at an astounding Rs 30,000 crore. Dat is 1575 % more than projected when we won the Bid! WTFF!! Even the Inflation a gift of SHARAD PAWAR which is hurting Indians most has not increased 2 dat much level!

Nw  Questions arises . How did Cost shot up so much? Where did the money Gone? How will Games be Salvaged n Blah..blah!!  Endless questions but with apologies no answer
No doubt delhi has changed a lot in recent years! Swanky flyovers, Delhi Metro and improved transport system. if u guyz remember Living in West Delhi and going to Cp was a nightmare but now its just a Metro away!. Still Lot has to be done! Stadiums Are in a royal mess .. Last week went 2 CP n looking at its amount of Digging seems some new city is coming up der!  Whole Delhi is Dug up and is  in a Debris mess and everytime we see a debris or a Digging site, we see only 1 line n dat is-
                                CONSTRUCTION GOING ON FOR CWG-2010!
Well i dont think aftr being stuck in Endless Jams  and seeing above Line any Sporting Feeling Arouses in people! Games are a symbol Of Sporting pride n Joyness but are we seeing any Joy in it? Whole games have been surrounded by Loads of  negativity.
 The one n nly CALAMITY On DELHI-SURESH कलमाड़ी
PIC Courtesy-TOI Delhi
Well  what can be said about the current Most hated figure of Delhi! If Chetan bhagat Wrote 3 Mistakes of my life Calamity has already Done 60 MISTAKES OF HIS LYF ! He dont even know  how 2 play any sport n has been Stuck with Indian Olympic Assocaition (IOA) from the past 28 years as Mika Stuck 2 Rakhi Sawants lips!
Goverments go, olympics go, even all ppl change but u have a bearded moron Smiling in IOA office as it is his ancestral property! Out of 1.2 billion ppl of India dis asshole has been entrusted 2 head CWG OC(Organsing Corruption) and doing exactly what its name suggests. He runs on a tread mill for which Rent is 9.75 lakhs, Uses a Umbrella worth of 7000! Whooho! After Seeing Dis LALIT MODI looks Like a Innoncent child!
                                      CALAMITY KI JAI HO!
And how 2 forget our Sports minister M,S Gill saying  "ONCE BARAAT ARRIVES EVERYTHING WILL BE IN PALCE"!!! I have a 1 word fr it.WOW!! Can we expect more stupidity Mr Gill?
Coming back 2 Calamity now he has been crying hoarse -I dint knew anythn .Not ma mistake! Cummon calamity d Rs 30000 crore  sucker!! Give a good answer. and as MR jhunjhunwala correctly Terms him as Sure-Shit-Kalmadi!!  He deserves it.
THE AWESOME MEDIA OF INDIA
 Well what can i say about our awesome TRP hungry News Channels . U Flip  remote as many times u can but on every channel you will see one thing in common- Bashing Of Games n His Great ness CALAMITY! Were they sleeping from past 3 years that suddenly just before 2 Months they hv been given a awakening injection and now  they are doing their So called investigations! The little left image has been tarnished so badly in World that now any Council in their dreams will not  take a risk by giving hosting rights to India!  Every Day a new Scam Comes up but the Big Question is How Suddenly evrythng is cropping up?  Why nt before? Dis answers can only  be given by Sahu maharaj of INDIA TV...
.
FINAL WORD
There's a popular Indian word, jugaad Loosely translated, it means improvisations and band-aid solutions that show native inventiveness born out a culture of scarcity and survival. jugaad is  very much an Indian obsession, Here Everything is done by jugaad and as the frantic, embarrassing, shameful last-minute rush goes  to salvage the 2010 Commonwealth Games from disaster .\
 Games vl some how happen , we will win some medals by competing against likes OF Honduras, St nevils and East timor.etc and after that News channels will forget evrything and SHITTY CALAMITY vl be happily realxing his Butt in IOA office! coz Dis is India where evrtyhng is CONSTANT and Forgotten especially Shits like KALAMDI!! 
Now winding up Hoping as a true Indian that we stage succesful games despite likes Of Calamity..


till den
Cheers :)
JATIN PANCHHI aka JATIN JP









Tuesday, August 3, 2010

Finally M Blogging

DAY-1.. Well its nt exactly my first post its basically an Intro! 
Sooo Finally Aftr 2 Month of Dilly Dollying m at last bitten By The Blogging bug.... first heard about blogging  way Back in 2007 bt passed it off as not so Cool thing! Phew !! Immaturity may be!! N After my entrance exams got over i gave it a serious thought as many of my freinds Suggested as they know me being a Knowledge junkie should start writing.. But as lazy I am  as my freinds better know! Always postoponed it by saying-

                     AREY YAAR KAR LENGE KAUNSA LYF KHATM HO RHI HAI!!!
But yesterday finally woke up n here it is I am here Blogging.... I Got this fascination by micro-blogging Twitter at  where am very active and  My freinds call me an TWITTER ADDICT but really I enjoy tweeting n sharing my Views there and  i dont know i somehow enjoy this thing termed boring by My Not So Cool Frnzz :D!! but despite ol dis I Love Tweeting n Vl always do it! I have many thoughts in my Mind regarding CWG, MOvies, etc..etc n will surely write my Views on it and i expect u all 2 Like it .
Till den Cheers :)
JATIN aka JP